The Festive season has finally kicked in and of course, we are all excited. Who doesn’t love food, shopping, and gossip (at least at times)? But like they say, there is always a flip side wanting to engulf you, that dreaded look, those hounding eyes and those on-point sarcastic remarks, all made by no one other than the “Kitty Party Gang”. Our mom’s love them, we avoid them and society approves them. So while you enjoy the festivities around you, we bring you nine ways to combat “the kitty party force” (thank us later)
1. Well, let’s first talk about the pre-preparation mode, which starts early on at 5 a.m., when mom starts cooking and cleaning up the entire house. Oh! How can your room be forgotten then, because it will obviously be the messiest part of it, so at least hide in the clutter at the safest place so that it doesn’t catch any eye, a night before?
2. Well, this is also to save you from the constant wakeup call, which will start from the earliest, that is 5 a.m. in the morning, because you know you need to help her in the kitchen, look perfect, wear the best clothes. We totally empathize guys but there is no escaping it.
3. Don’t try to make an excuse or get together with best friends, which will lead to an entire emotional drama of “you don’t care about me” or “family doesn’t matter to you”, which will be a waste of another two hours of your day. That’s why we are here to help you play safe and play along.
4. Sitting in the washroom for 2 hours before the party begins won’t help. The K-force knows this trick already. So be creative, hop on that treadmill and burn all the extra calories today. Use your anger in the right direction.
5. Dress up like you are about to receive the Academy Award for the best actress because trust us, you don’t want your mommy to throw you and your favorite PJs out the very next morning when she hears her friends ask if you have just woken up.
6. When they ask you about your life plans, (a.k.a -when are you getting married, how much is your job paying you; awww, is that your boyfriend and so on), tell them you are taking salvation and going to Ladakh for a year.
7. The moment they enter the home, pamper them with a nice refreshing tea because that is the best escape from the question-answer round which you might have to bear with for long. So, avoid that too and earn bonus points of ‘Your daughter/son makes such nice tea’, (PS: how we wish we could use it in our resume).
8. If they are going out for the festive shopping, don’t get lured by the fantasy of getting some pretty dress for free. Allow us the delusion; you’ll end up picking up their bags full and being the driver.
9. When the time will come for serving them food, which is obviously a lot because remember your mom was awake since 5 a.m. for the same, make sure you are the one who is warming it and laying it out; make sure your mom doesn’t get up to do it, because they all had taken moral science classes very seriously.
Well, dear aunties, we mean no harm, you actually add charm to our houses whenever you come, but certain things are just beyond our understanding.
P.S.: we love you.
For more such articles, please visit the author- That Girl In Red Pyjamas.