Relationships are an integral part of life. We meet people that we connect with at an exceptional level. They make us feel intensely special by sharing with us the love that we crave. We get butterflies in our stomach when we think of them and being with them makes us pleased and full of peace. They share with us some of the most memorable moments of our lives, yet sometimes relationships end. Getting over a bad breakup is never easy, it might just be one of the greatest obstacles of life to forget someone we loved dearly and move on from that to a life without them and without who we became when we were with them. But it’s essential to come out of a bad breakup stronger than before, not with a wall around you keeping you from ever sharing the love with anyone, but with a heart still soft and standing that is ready to spread love wherever it goes.
Here’s a round-up of 10+ wellness practices that you should follow to get over a bad breakup and emerge with strength and grace.
1. Journal Your Emotions
Your emotions need to be liberated out in order for you to cope with them better. Your diary is your best friend when no one else can understand what you’re going through.
“The pen is mightier than the keyboard.”
Keeping an offline diary is the preferable choice according to scientific studies. When you type, you’re just pressing keys, same motion again and again. But while you’re writing, you’re writing the actual characters by your hands, this process promotes more thoughts and creativity in your brain. You must also try to focus more on the things that make you happy and grateful instead of writing about what went wrong. That way you can mold your thoughts to be optimistic.
2. One Task At A Time
It’s our instinct to drown ourselves in work when we’re trying to get over a bad breakup so we have minimal free time to think about it. But multi-tasking is not the way to go, my friend. The human brain is not designed to multi-task, so even if you’re doing a lot of things at once, you’re doing them in parts, which increases the chances of you mixing them up and hence screwing them up. Instead, if you calmly concentrate on one task at a time, you can improve your throughput and efficiency to obtain the optimal result and perform great with work which will ultimately boost your self-confidence.
3. Focus On The Better, Not The Best
Einstein righteously formulated the theory of relativity in 1905 conveying that there is no “absolute frame of reference”, which means every time you’re measuring something, it’s in comparison to something else. Hence, chances are null that you’re going to find anything that’s “best” for you. Therefore, you should try to focus on the “better”; i.e. try to be better than who you were yesterday rather than trying to be the best or supreme. While making choices, you should evaluate all your options by deciding what’s better for you at this time in your life, will you or will you not be able to abide by the choices you make? Taking a slow pace with your choices is the better choice than pushing yourself to impossibly be the best in a flash.
4. Celebrate Your Streaks
A study from MIT revealed that we don’t really learn much from failures as we do from success. Meaning, by going the wrong way, we’ll only find out that that was the wrong way; we will not figure out what the right way is. When you do something right, dopamine is released by your neurons which is a neurotransmitter that promotes the feeling of pleasure. Not just that, it also improves your memory, learning processes and how you retain information. Every time you achieve something, make note of it so you can refer it to motivate yourself and know that you did it once so you can do it again and even push yourself to do better.
5. Set Exciting Goals
Wanting to achieve something is an amazing part of life, it gives you a reason to get up in the morning with determination and fall asleep at night with satisfaction. Setting exciting goals is not about becoming a millionaire overnight, it’s about losing or gaining those 5 kgs in a month or about saving penny by penny to buy that car. Accomplishing these little goals will eventually lead to you being able to bet on yourself and setting higher goals in the future.
“Shoot for the stars, shoot for the stars my ladies and my lords. Shoot for the stars and the stars shall be yours.”
6. Join A Fitness Regime
You will experience a number of emotions including anger, regret, sorrow, stress while trying to get over a bad breakup. Eating a lot of food that isn’t good for you, staying shut indoors all day and completely letting go of who you are as a person is not the answer. Taking out time to spend at the gym or joining a yoga or an aerobics class can be a fulfilling way of reconnecting with yourself. Once your body is fit, so will be your mind. As a result, you will be in control of your emotions. Hence, you can impose positivity in your life by replacing all the negative feelings that you have left post your breakup and create a win-win situation for your body and your mind.
7. Stay Hydrated
When you’re getting over a bad breakup, there are no surprises if you’re familiar with teary eyes, wet pillows, and dry throat. Dehydration is no friend to your body. Not only does it leave you feeling sleepier during the daytime, it also affects your brain making you less active. It can even cause mood-swings, loss of skin moisture and reduce cognitive functioning. The first step to caring for yourself is to keep your health in check. Drink up at least 8-12 cups of water to stay hydrated and flourish.
8. Connect With Your Inner Circle
It’s our tendency to spend less time with our friends when we’re busy watering a blooming relationship. But these friends are the ones you can rely on for comfort when you have to get over your bad breakup. They’ll listen to you when you’re venting, extend a shoulder to cry on and help you realize that there’s more to life than just one single relationship that ended badly. Your mourning period will prove to be a good time to reconnect with your closest ride-or-die friends whether it’s by sipping some martinis or booking a spa day together.
9. Practice Buddhism
Chanting “Nam myoho renge kyo” is a means of experiencing the state of natural development of happiness, increased vitality, courage, wisdom, and compassion which is the state of Buddhahood. It is a form of prayer where the receiving end is not an external entity but our own self, directly addressing the inner power we have to create solutions to our problems and live more satisfactory lives. This practice can help you get in tune with your inner Buddha nature and manifest happiness in your life.
10. Practice Gratitude
Contentment is one of the greatest feelings in life. Wanting something and working hard to achieve that is natural. But not needing it and being grateful for all you have is important. Sometimes we get obsessed with getting some things in life that we forget the importance of the other things that we already have. Losing your significant other must not leave you feeling like you’ve lost everything. It is of utmost importance that in a time like this, you remember everything you have that you’re grateful for and value a lot. Only then will you be able to recognize yourself out of the relationship that just went south.
11. Indulge In Hearty Foods That Nourish Your Soul
Pamper yourself like a lover would by taking yourself out to check out that new restaurant or trying a new recipe that you saw on Instagram. Food just has a way of making people happy. Eating food that helps you cherish your body and your soul is one thing you should be looking forward to when you’re getting over a bad breakup. Treating yourself with red wine, hot chocolate, cupcakes, and pizza will be an indication that you’ve grown to care for yourself and be kind to yourself and you don’t need anyone else to do it for you. Coddling yourself with healthy foods that your body and soul both love is a great way to fill your heart with care and joy.
12. Make Self-Improvement A Priority
Heartbreak is supposed to make you stronger and the phase of getting over a breakup is supposed to be a phase of deep growth. It’s a time to learn to focus on yourself and reclaim your identity as an individual. Working to be better must be on the top of your agenda. In this phase, you’ll become mature enough to be able to handle it on your own and help others when they’re going through a tough time as well. Self-improvement should be your priority since you’re living your life for yourself, not for anyone else.
“Don’t cry when the sun is gone because the tears won’t let you see the stars.”
It’s important to invest your time in building yourself up rather than grieving on what’s lost and let it feed on your present and ruin your future. Remember, the greatest love you’ll ever receive is the one that lies within you.