It’s nights that turn into mornings, days that turn into months and phone calls that turn into quick snapchats.
It’s the calls that you answer at your convenience and texts that you leave unread.
It’s the snaps that you send when you’re bored because you’re wondering what she’s up to.
It’s the cancelling of plans every time something better comes along.
It’s the hope that you give her, that’s bare minimum. But she anyway takes it because she’s not the one to give up something so great so easily. Because she has always believed in second chances and more than anything, she has always believed in YOU. You might call her a fool for having trusted you over and over again but don’t forget, you’re slowly losing her every time you slack, because she isn’t the one to mend broken hearts. Because she knows that everyone has to do his healing on his own.
It’s every act of hers that you take for granted and every little surprise that you miss in the fog of your sheer indifference. You lose her a little in all of those small-huge minutes that pass by without her crossing your mind. You lose her a little every time she goes to bed wondering “what did I do wrong?” You lose her a little when you make her doubt if she isn’t enough. And you lose her a little more every time you have eyes for another woman, when the only person she’s ever had eyes for is you. Despite of this, she will defend you from herself and all her girlfirends who can clearly see what a truckload of crap you are. She will defend you because she’s still holding on to the slight glimmer of hope that you will come back because she has heard stories of damaged people returning back to their homes.
What she fails to realize is that her feelings for you blind her of the reality. She fails to realize that she is more than enough for you. It’s you who isn’t worthy of her love and time, because if you would have been worthy, you would have never made her question your love for her. But dare you worry about her, because she is like that little undeterred child, who will always stand up right back every time she falls. She is like an arrow, the more you pull her backwards, the higher she will soar.
And one day you will lose her completely, because she is like that ever-flowing water that you cannot hold in your fist. All you can do is simply swim in its flow.
One day, she will start loving herself more than any damn thing in this world and you will lose her forever.
That day, don’t miss her.
Don’t get unsettled and annoyed if you ask her out and she politely refuses.
Don’t be shocked if it’s no longer you who makes her smile.
Don’t get downplayed if you see her all happy and successful without you.
Don’t be stunned the day she starts treating you the way you treated her and most importantly, don’t come crawling back to her.